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    February 23, 2024

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 23rd, 2024 - “When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candles. I’m sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.” George Carlin

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 25th, 2024 - Join us for morning worship on this third Sunday of Lent. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 25th, 2024 - 2:00 – Toronto Beach Chorale – Vivaldi/Bach Concert. At Beaches Presbyterian Church. Tickets $30.00

MISSION CAPSULE: We really appreciate the program, as we are in dire need to keep the education going for our kids, shared a grateful parent. For Afghan children who sought refuge in Pakistan, education is often out of reach because they are not nationals. PWS&D supports the Digital Learning Center in Peshawar, which provides out of school children and adults with basic digital literacy classes, high school courses and tutoring sessions that aim to help a total of 520 students. Students and their family members are benefiting from the Darakht-e Danesh Library, which provides free and open educational resources on such topics as math, language, business and the sciences. Students access classes both in English and Dari/Farsi, equipping them with essential skills and providing hope for those who have lost so much, broadening their opportunities for the future.

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 27th, 2024 - Theology on Tap will meet at Feathers at 6:30 for dinner, 7:00 for discussion.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 28th, 2024 - Beaches Prayer Group will meet at 9:30

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 28th, 2024 - The Beach and East Toronto Historical Society presents author Lorna Poplak “The Don”. The story of Toronto’s Infamous Jail at the Beaches Sandbox, 2181 Queen East 7:00 – 8:15 admission free.


Then there was the time Fruit of the Loom took Hanes to court …. It was a brief case…

How much does a chimney cost? Nothing, it’s on the house…

The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song but the chick peas can only hummus one …

Singing in the shower is fine until you get soap in your mouth – then it is a soap opera …

I tried to come up with a carpentry pun that woodwork. I thought I nailed it but nobody saw it …

I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes. Now I have Heinzsight…

AND THIS … If ever there is a tomorrow when we are not together. There is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, Stronger than you seem and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we are apart, I’ll always be with you.
Winnie the Pooh

Have a good week MB

    February 16, 2024

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 16th, 2024 - “I am not a has been. I am a will be.” Lauren Bacall

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 18th, 2024 - First Sunday of Lent - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: Two year old Moriama Safianu has a congenital deformity linked to hydrocephalus. Born into a poor family in northern Ghana, Moriama faced the heavy burden of social stigma, prompting her parents to keep her indoors to shield her from the community’s hurtful judgements. Things changed when she was identified for support during a community survey conducted by a community rehabilitation program. The dedicated staff referred her to the Garu Presbyterian Health Centre for specialized care. The staff at Garu also worked with Moriama’s community to address the stigma she had been facing. Moriama’s mother expressed her profound gratitude. “I am immensely thankful to the CBR program and PWS&D for coming to our aid. Thanks to your intervention Moriama is no longer subjected to stigma from the community members.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 19th, 2024 - Toronto Beaches Lions Free Family Day Skate at Ted Reeve arena – 3:00 – 5:00 Hot chocolate and treats.,

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 20th, 2024 - Theology on Tap will gather at 6:30 for dinner, 7:00 for discussion.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 21st, 2024 - Beaches Prayer Group will meet in the prayer room at 9:30.


Six cows were smoking joints and playing poker. That’s right. The steaks were pretty high….

I was struggling to understand how lightning works and then it struck me….

I want to tell you about a girl who only eats plants. You probably have not heard of herbivore.

My friend Jack says he can communicate with vegetables. That’s right – Jack and the beans talk ….

My friend said she wouldn’t eat cow’s tongue because it came out of a cow’s mouth. I gave her an egg….

Once upon a time there was a King who was only 12 inches tall. He was a terrible King but he made a great ruler….

Have a good week MB

    February 9, 2024

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 9th, 2024 - “If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster” Clint Eastwood

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 11th, 2024 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. We will celebrate Communion

Following service, Debbie Murray will hold a Bake Sale for Valentines Day.

MISSION CAPSULE: In response to an invitation from Palestinian Christians, the PCC (through Presbyterians Sharing) sent Robyn Ahn ( St. Andrews, Barrie) and Urwah Rasool (Unionville, PC) to Palestine/Israel through the Journey for Justice program hosted by the PCC’s partner Joint Advocacy initiative of the East Jerusalem YMCA/YWCA. With 23 other young people, they experienced the daily life of Palestinian youth, listening to their stories and seeing first hand how occupying measures impacted them. It was an unforgettable eye-opening experience for Robyn and Urwah.

Looking back: In March 1879 the first telephone exchange was established in Toronto, on King Street, East. Company policy at that time was to hire only male operators.

In the early 1900’s working as a telephone operator was a job that a girl from a better class family could accept. The standard dress code was a dark, ankle length skirt and a white tailored blouse.

Coming up: Ash Wednesday Service - February 14th, 2024 - beginning of Lent.

Annual AGM following worship – March 3rd, 2024

Jazz Service March 17th, 2024

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 13th, 2024 - Theology on Tap will gather at 6:30 for dinner 7:00 for discussion

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 14th, 2024 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30

STUPID STUFF – these are taken from letters to school principals …. I have not changed the spellings

- My son is under a doctors care and cannot take PE today. Please execute him ….

- Please exkuce Lisa from being absent from class, she was sick and I had her shot ….

- Dear School: please excuse John being absent on January 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 also 33 ….

- Please excuse Gloria from Jim today she is administrating ….

- Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip ….

Have a good week - MB

    February 2, 2024

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 2nd, 2024 - “What day is it”? “It’s today” squeaked Piglet. “My favourite day” said Pooh

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4th, 2024 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 - Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: For decades, PWS&D has faithfully dedicated itself to serving those in need across the globe. In collaboration with our valued partners, PWS&D is actively contributing to positive transformation within our global community. From responding to emergencies to helping families and communities access nutritious food, clean water, adequate health care and quality education, PWS&D is helping people thrive. As people of faith, we respond to Christ’s call to walk with the distressed and marginalized, work towards equality, the restoration of human dignity, peace, and care for God’s creation. Together we are working towards a sustainable, compassionate and just world.

COMING UP: Wednesday, February 14th, 2024 - Ash Wednesday Service – 7:00

Sunday, February 18th, 2024 - First Sunday of Lent

FEBRUARY BIRTHDAYS - Klaas Kraay; Don Anderson; Liz vanZanden; Jerry Greer; Will Greenley; Nathan Greenley; Sybil Hiraishi

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 6th, 2024 - Theology on Tap will gather at Feathers – 6:30 for dinner 7:00 for discussion.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 7th, 2024 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30

Did you know – Canada is home to more lakes than any other country in the world. Of the more than 1.4 million lakes (over .1 square mile or larger) on Earth, upward of 60 percent of them are in Canada.

More silliness:

Did you know that 90% of bald people still own a comb? They just can’t part with it …

Every morning I get hit by the same bicycle. It’s a vicious cycle …

It’s pretty obvious that if I run in front of a car I will get tired – but if I run behind a car will I get exhausted…

Have a good week MB

    January 26, 2024

FRIDAY, JANUARY 26th, 2024 - “Sometimes I sits and thinks and sometimes I just sit” Winnie the Pooh

SUNDAY, JANUARY 28th, 2024 - Come and join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Guest Preacher – Cole Kim.

MISSION CAPSULE: In Nepal, Nirba struggled with an undiagnosed skin condition that kept her inside. In addition to her health struggles, Nirba grappled with financial instability. Because she couldn’t afford medical assistance, Nirba borrowed money from friends and relatives. Thanks to a clinic set up by the International Nepal Fellowship a (PWS&D) partner, Nirba was able to meet with a dermatologist, receive a diagnosis of leprosy and begin treatment. The clinic’s support also provided financial aid for Nirba’s child’s education. Nirba expressed profound gratitude for this assistance as it not only helped her son but her own health situation as well.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 30th, 2024 - Theology on Tap will gather at 6:30 for dinner – 7:00 for discussion.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 31st, 2024 - Beaches Prayer Group will meet in the prayer room at 9:30

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 3rd, 2024 - Jazz and Reflection at Beach United Church – 4:30 – featuring Jazz bassist Paul Novotny & friends.

COMING UP: Ash Wednesday Service – February 14th, 2024 - then Lent begins ..

SUNDAY, MARCH 3rd, 2024 - Beaches Annual AGM meeting – following worship - Time to get your reports in to Julian …


I’ve just finished reading a book about the world’s greatest basement. It was a best cellar….

It’s my first week working at the bicycle factory and they’ve already made me a spokesperson ….

I thought swimming with dolphins was expensive until I went swimming with sharks – it cost me an arm and a leg ….

The main function of your big toe is to make sure all the furniture in the house is in the right place ….

The word incorrectly is spelled incorrectly in every dictionary ….

Have a good week - MB

    January 19, 2024

FRIDAY, JANUARY 19th, 2024 - “Certain things, they should stay the way they are. You ought to be able to stick them in one of those big glass cases and just leave them alone.” J. D. Salinger

SUNDAY, JANUARY 21ST, 2024 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: We are God’s people, called to serve God with our many gifts. We belong to a denomination that is connected by faith, governance, history and mission. Presbyterians Sharing … is one of the ways that Presbyterians across Canada work together to proclaim the good news of Jesus Christ, sharing God’s love and hope in our communities, in Canada and around the world. Gifts to Presbyterians Sharing … help build strong congregations, serve vulnerable people, walk with indigenous people, seek justice and share God’s love. When we work together we can accomplish so much more than we ever could on our own.

Word Wise - which word is not like the others? Cashmere Angora Mohair Sisal

TUESDAY, JANUARY 23rd, 2024 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 24th, 2024 - Beaches Prayer Group will meet at 9:30

More silliness :

The patron saint of poverty is St. Nickeless …

What did the man say when the bridge fell on him? The suspension is killing me …

How do they figure out the price of hammers? Per pound …

There was quite a big paddle sale at the boat store. It was quite an oar deal …

What is a thesaurus’s favourite dessert? Synonym buns …

My tailor is happy to make a new pair of pants for me. Or sew it seams …

Do you have weight loss mantras? Fat chants …

ANSWER: Sisal is a fiber that comes from plants, the other fibers come from animals.

Did you Know? Canada is home to more lakes than any other country in the world. Of the more than 1.4 million lakes (over .1 square mile or larger) on Earth, upward of 60% of them are in Canada.

Have a good week - MB

    January 12, 2024

FRIDAY, JANUARY 12th, 2024 - “I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things and I have succeeded fairly well.” Robert Benchley

SUNDAY, JANUARY 14th, 2024 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00, Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. We will celebrate communion.

MISSION CAPSULE: Sohdi became the sole provider for her family when her husband died a decade ago. A farmer in Pakistan, she plants various crops but droughts and floods have disrupted food production for three years. In 2021 Sohdi received aid through the Humanitarian Early Recovery and Development project supported by PWS&D, which provided food aid to households in need. This assistance enabled her family to eat properly even during times of failed harvests. The project also provided support for women artisans to improve their skills and market their goods, making them more resilient for the future. Sohdi is grateful for this support that allowed her to stay out of debt. Now, she dreams of her son’s wedding as well as sending her other children to school.

DID YOU KNOW: The first ball dropped in Times Square weighed 700 pounds. Today’s model weighs 11,875 pounds thanks to the 2688 handmade Waterford crystals that cover it.”

TUESDAY, JANUARY 16th, 2024 - Theology on Tap with gather at Feathers at 7:00 – 6:30 for dinner – we will be discussing Chapter 5 of Send Them Here. Next week we will begin to discuss “When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty without Hurting the Poor …. And Yourself by Steve Corbett, Brian Fikkert and John M. Perkins.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 17th, 2024 - Beaches Prayer Group will meet in the Prayer Room at 9:30


So what if I don’t know the meaning of the ‘apocalypse’? It’s not the end of the world …

Alternative facts are aversion of the truth …

Atheism is a non-prophet organization …

I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it …

Did you know they won’t be making yardsticks any longer? …

Have a good week - MB

    January 5, 2024

FRIDAY, JANUARY 5th, 2024 - “Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes” Maggie Smith (I just learned that I am older than she is!!! M

Coming up - BEACHES Annual Meeting …..

Ash Wednesday service

Lent …

SUNDAY, JANUARY 7th, 2024 - Epiphany Sunday - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 - Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading

MISSION CAPSULE: Sisters in Spirit is an initiative started in 2005 by the Native Women’s Association of Canada to draw attention to the shockingly high levels of violence that indigenous women in Canada face. It was the first government funded data to gather information on missing or murdered indigenous women over the preceding thirty years and collected information on 600 women. A 2021 RCMP report recorded that there were 1,181 police reported homicides or unresolved mission person cases for indigenous women between 1980 and 2012. Sisters in Spirit vigils are held annually on October 4th in memory of murdered and missing indigenous women.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 9th, 2024 - Theology on Tap will gather at Feathers at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, JAUARY 10th, 2024 – Beaches prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

JANUARY BIRTHDAYS - Jill Hutchinson, Tory Hoff, Meghan vanZanden, Erin Sclisizzi


The meaning of opaque is unclear….

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down …

A man tried to assault me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy …

I wasn’t going to get a brain transplant but then I changed my mind …

Police were called to the daycare center. A three year old was resisting a rest …

The other day I held the door open for a clown. I thought it was a nice jester …

Have a good week - MB