2022

December 28, 2022

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 28th, 2022 - “That what came into existence was Life, and the Life was Light to live by. The Life-Light blazed out of the darkness and the darkness couldn’t put it out.”

SUNDAY, JANUARY 1st, 2023 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

SUNDAY, JANUARY 1st, 2023 - Hair of the Dog Run/Walk at the boardwalk by the Balmy Beach Club. 11:30 start 3km. walk. 12 noon start 11 km run.

MISSION CAPSULE: When we give to Presbyterians Sharing... we express our faith. Together we continue Christ’s ministry engaging in vibrant and faithful ministries in our communities, our country and around the world. Together we call for justice and act with compassion. We support ministries with indigenous people, both in and outside Canada. We send mission staff to accompany international partners. We support ministries that provide aid for refugees, people involved in the sex trade and all who are vulnerable to exploitation. We start and build new faith communities and encourage and support congregations renewing their ministries. Together, we are making a difference. Together, we are Presbyterians Sharing...

MONDAY, JANUARY 2nd, 2023 - Theology on Tap will NOT meet this evening. They will meet again January 9th, 2023 via zoom

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 4th, 2023 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30.

A LITTLE HISTORY…

When Franklin Roosevelt started a foundation to fight polio, Comedian Eddie Cantor came up with the “March of Dimes”, asking people to mail a dime to the White House. They were soon overwhelmed with 2,680,000 dimes mailed to them, literally truckloads, mostly from children. These dimes went directly to research that resulted in the Polio vaccine. This is why Roosevelt is on the U.S. dime.

The fourth wiseman. The fourth wiseman was delayed on the journey as he stopped to give aid to a stranger . In trying to catch up he was delayed a second and third time as he stopped again and again to help people along the way. By the time he arrived in Bethlehem, Joseph and Mary had fled to Egypt. Off he went to Egypt, again stopping along the way to give aid to whoever needed it. He continued to follow Joseph, Mary and the babe but each time just missed them. He made a stop in a leper colony and stayed there for several years to do whatever he could to help and to minister. He finally caught up with Jesus when he was on the cross. He had followed Him all his life.

Have a blessed New Year - MB

December 19, 2022

MONDAY, DECEMBER 19th, 2022 - It’s Christmas week, for most of us our trees are up and decorated, baking has been done and perhaps we can settle in to a week of just enjoying the season.

THIS WEEK:

MONDAY, DECEMBER 19th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will not be meeting again until January.

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 21ST, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the prayer room.

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 21st, 2022 - Longest Night Service 7:30

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 24th, 2022 - Christmas Eve Family Service - 6:30

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 24th, 2022 - Christmas Eve Late Service - 9:30

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 25th, 2022 - there will be no service on Christmas Day.

Enjoy

December 15, 2022

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 15th, 2022 - “Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere is that none of it has tried to contact us.” Bill Watterson

SUNDAY, December 18th, 2022 - Fourth Sunday of Advent - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: Through gifts to Presbyterians Sharing … Cyclical PCC supports many important outreach ministries in Canada. One such ministry is the Presbytery of Montreal’s Communaute Riviere des Prairies, a new worshipping community in the city’s east end. Riviere des Prairies embraces multilingualism in their church services and children’s programming, providing an open and welcoming space for newcomers to Canada. Over five different languages and dialects are used by the ministry to connect with newcomers, both in the church family and in the wider community.

INTERESTING FACTS: Despite being dead for over a year, famous author Agatha Christie saved a baby’s life in 1977. Her novel, The Pale Horse, described thallium poisoning so well that a nurse who had been reading it was able to diagnose a sick one year old who had doctors stumped. The baby was immediately tested, they found traces of thallium, doctors changed treatments and her life had been saved by an old murder mystery novel.

MONDAY, DECEMBER 19th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00 via Zoom

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 21st, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30.

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 21st, 2022 - 7:30 - Longest Night Service

CHRISTMAS STUFF:

What in the world do leaping lords, French hens, swimming swans and a partridge who won’t come out of the pear tree have to do with Christmas?

From 1558 until 1829 Roman Catholics in England were not permitted to practice their faith openly. Someone during that era wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics. It has two levels of meaning; the surface meaning plus a hidden meaning known only to members of their church. Each element in the carol as a code word for a religious reality which the children could remember.

The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ.

Two turtle doves were the Old and New Testaments.

Three French hens stood for faith, hope and love.

The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark Luke & John.

The five golden rings recalled the Torah or Law, the first five books of the Old Testament.

The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation.

Seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit – Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership and Mercy.

The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes.

Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit – Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control.

The ten lords a-leaping were the ten commandments.

The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful disciples.

The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve points of belief in the Apostles’ Creed.

There you are – a mysterious carol explained.

Have a good week - MB

December 8, 2022

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 8th, 2022 - “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”
John Lennon

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 9th, 2022 - 8:00 - The Toronto Consort presents: Praetorius Christmas Vespers
SATURDAY, DECEMBER 10th, 2022 - 2:00pm and 8:00 pm
The Friday performance will be filmed with a live audience for Early Music TV.
Tickets starting at $20.00
Trinity-St.Paul’s Centre, 427 Bloor Street, West – Spadina Station
For further information speak to Don Anderson, Michael Brett or Heather Crisp

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 10th, 2022 - Jazz & Reflection at Beach United Church – 4:30 – featuring Mike & Jill Daley for favourite Christmas music

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 11th, 2022 - Advent Three – Jazz Service – we will celebrate Communion.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 11TH, 2022 - Toronto Beach Chorale present The Messiah at 7:30 at Kingston Road United Church.

MISSION CAPSULES: In Nepal, 70 year old Dhani Gharti found a boil on the sole of her foot. When she sought treatment, Dhani received a diagnosis of leprosy. Despite taking medication for a year, Dhani’s wound kept coming back. One day, Dhani’s friend told her about the PWS&D supported Shining Hospital, a Christian hospital run by the International Nepal Fellowship, where she thought Dhani could get more successful treatment. “Every time I visit the Shining Hospital with my wounded foot, the nurses always welcome me and give the best medical care. They always show love and care while dressing my wounds.” Shared Dhani.

Of interest: Jonas Salk (1914 – 1995) decided not to patent his 1955 Polio Vaccine so that it would be affordable for millions of people who couldn’t afford it. As a result, he lost out on an estimated 7 billion dollars.

MONDAY, DECEMBER 12th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00 via zoom

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 13th, 2022 - 7:30 - Toronto Community Orchestra will perform music by Mozart; Balmages;
Tchaikovsky; Anderson and Royse. Eastminister United Church, 310 Danforth Avenue, just east of Broadview.
This is a free concert. For information speak to Susan Kopulos

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 14th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will meet at 9:30 in the prayer room

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 21st, 2022 - 7:30 – Longest Night Service

STUFF:

I’m reading a Horror book in Braille Something bad is going to happen! I can feel it..

The reason that aliens have never visited us is because our solar system has received terrible reviews.

We only have one star!

When does a joke become a Dad joke? When it becomes apparent.

Where do rainbows go when they are bad? Prism. It’s a light sentence.

My boss asked me why I was only sick on work days. I said it must be my weekend immune system.

My wife accused me of stealing her Thesaurus. Not only was I shocked, but I was appalled, aghast and dismayed……

Have a good week - come to church. MB

December 1, 2022

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 1st, 2022 - “When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.” Gracie Allen

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 3rd, 2022 - Christmas Market at Beach United Church – 10:00 – 2:00 featuring local artisans, as well as baked goods, jams, jellies, handmade jewellery, etc.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 4th, 2022 - Second Sunday of Advent - join us for morning worship at 10:00. Carol singing at 9:50. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 4th, 2022 - 3:00 - Reading of Charles Dickens A Christmas Carol. Tickets $25:00 can be purchased through the office or at the door.

Debbie Murray is organising sweets for intermission and is looking for volunteers to help supply and package the treats. This year she is putting together “treat bags” so the treats should be small and nothing too moist or sticky. Cookies, squares, scones, candy are suggested.

We will also need some volunteers after worship to get the sanctuary ready.

MISSION CAPSULE: “Where is God in all of this oppression and injustice’? Upon hearing the anguished cries of Palestinian Christians, Palestinian clergy felt it was crucial to respond pastorally and remind them that God is the God of justice, the God who cares about the oppressed. These Christians need God’s hope. In 1989, Palestinian Christian theologians developed a theology that could be shared with fellow Palestinian believers. This led to the establishment of Sabeel Ecumenical Liberation Theology Center in Jerusalem, an ecumenical grassroots liberation theology movement. Presbyterians Sharing …supports Sabeel and Director Omar Haramy in standing with the oppressed, working for justice and engaging in peacebuilding.

DECEMBER BIRTHDAYS - Mary Beth Kraay, Doug Duke, Susan Kopulos, George Kopulos, Edye McLachlan, Elizabeth Adam

FACTS; In 1922, at the University of Toronto, scientists went to a hospital ward with children who were comatose and dying from diabetic keto-acidosis. The scientists went from bed to bed and injected the children with the new purified extract – insulin. As they began to inject the last comatose child, the first child injected began to awaken. One by one, all of the children awoke from their comas. A room of death and gloom, became a place of joy and hope. Thanks to Dr. Banting and Dr. Best….

MONDAY, DECEMBER 5th, 2022 - Theology on Tap – 7:00 via Zoom

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 7th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 11th, 2022 - Advent 3 Jazz Service

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 11th, 2022 - 7:30 – The Beach Chorale present Handel’s Messiah at Kingston Road United Church.

GRAPES AND OTHER STUFF:

I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It’s all about raisin awareness.

What word starts with E and ends with E but only has one letter in it? Envelope …

What days are the strongest? Saturday and Sunday. The rest are week days!

My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.

What word becomes shorter if you add two letters? Short!

Have a good week - MB

November 23, 2022

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 23rd, 2022 - I’m Back … after a week without the internet - - - -

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 26th, 2022 - Hope United Church, Jazz Vespers … 4:30 - featuring Laura Hubert, Peter Hill and Bob Brough

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 27th, 2022 - First Sunday in Advent – join us for morning worship at 10.00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: Raamia fled to Pakistan with her daughter after divorcing her abusive husband in Afghanistan. As a single mother, Raamia made and sold handicrafts to support herself and her daughter. On their way to the city of Lahore, she and her daughter got into an accident. Her daughter was unharmed but Raamia was severely injured resulting in her arm having to be amputated. After the accident, she could not continue working on her handicrafts. Raamia and her daughter were selected to receive cash support from a project by Community World Service Asia, a PWS&D partner. “I was able to buy some food supplies with the money I received,” she said. This project is helping refugee families who have fled Afghanistan since the Taliban takeover.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 28th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will meet at 7:00 via Zoom for in depth discussion.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 30th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

COMING UP: SUNDAY, DECEMBER 4th, 2022 - 3:00 - Reading of Charles Dicken’s A Christmas Carol.

NOTE: Debbie Murray will, once again, be organizing refreshments for the Christmas Carol event. Because of the pandemic she is planning to make up “treat” bags. She would appreciate any help with a variety of cookies, squares and scones. Treats must be small and nothing too moist or sticky in order to be safe in the bags. She is requesting that everything must be in the church kitchen by Sunday morning for her to have time to package them. She is also open to cash donations for purchasing some items.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 11th, 2022 - Advent 3 and Jazz Service

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 11th, 2022 - 7:30 – Beach Chorale present The Messiah at Kingston Road United Church

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 13th, 2022 - 7:30 - Toronto Community Orchestra present a Christmas Concert at Eastminster United Church, 310 Danforth Avenue. Featuring music from Mozart, Tchaikovsky, Balmages, Anderson, and Royse.

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 21st, 2022 - Longest night service - 7:30

MORE SIGNAGE:

Outside a second hand shop - We exchange anything – bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?

Notice in a health food shop window - Closed, due to illness

Spotted in a safari park: Elephants, please stay in your car.

Seen during a conference: For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is a day care on the 1st floor.

Notice in a farmer’s field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free but the bull charges.

And the last one - Hospitals are sued by 7 foot doctors!!!

Have a good week - MB

November 10, 2022

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 10th, 2022 - “Mix a little foolishness with your prudence, it’s good to be silly at the right moment.”
Horace

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 11th, 2022 - REMEMBRANCE DAY – Service at Kew Gardens - parade begins at 10:30 from Corpus Christie Church – service begins at 10:55

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 13th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

After worship, we are looking for volunteers to help rake and bag the leaves from our property. Rakes and bags provided.

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 13th, 2022 - 3:30 – Toronto Chamber Choir present a concert of music by Heinrich Schutz at the Church of the Redeemer, 162 Bloor Street, West. Tickets are $35:00 and are available at the door. Don Anderson, Heather and Michael Brett Crisp are members.

Refreshments following service supplied by George and Susan Kopulos.

MISSION CAPSULE: Village Safe Motherhood Committees are a vital part of PWS&D’s maternal, newborn and child health programming in Malawi. The people who run the committees work tirelessly to ensure that pregnant women and their partners are informed about the community services available to them before, during and after the birth of their child – and why these services are so important. Committee staff advise women to attend check-ups and deliver at a health-care facility, as well as encourage partner participation. They also educate parents about the importance of vaccination and proper nutrition. This is life-saving work for many pregnant women and infants in Malawi.

NOVEMBER BIRTHDAYS: Pat Fraser; Matt Hiraishi; Jim Olthuis

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 14th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather for a great discussion at 7:00 via zoom

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 16th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the prayer room.

MORE SIGNAGE

Cold Wave linked to temperatures!

Enfield (London) couple slain. Police suspect Homicide

Red tape holds up new bridges….

Man struck by lightning: Faces battery charge.

New study of obesity looks for larger test group.

Astronaut takes blame for gas in spacecraft ..

Kids make nutritious snacks …

After tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board…

Have a good week - be careful out there MB

November 3, 2022

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 3rd, 2022 - “I love to think of nature as an unlimited broadcasting station, through which God speaks to us every hour, if we will only tune it.”
George Washington Carver

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 5th, 2022 - Jazz & Reflection at Beach United – 4:30 – cool jazz – East Coast meets West Coast….featuring The Octakats

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 5th, 2022 - Change your clocks

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 6th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Gary Lyon preaching

MISSION CAPSULE: The Presbyterian Church in Canada has a long history of mission in nursing and health care in India. For over 150 years, over 250 missionaries have served in this work. Today, the PCC partners with the Graduate School for Nurses which is part of the Christian Medical Association of India. They offer hands-on education for nursing students that promotes and contributes to clinical and professional excellence. Shimy Mathew, Secretary of the Nurses League has asked for prayers “for wisdom to discern God’s will for the institution” in light of the recent challenges the school is facing due to government regulations. We join Shimy in prayer and give thanks for her deep faith in Jesus and for her perseverance.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 7th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 9th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

COMING UP – MARK YOUR CALENDARS.

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 13th, 2022 - 3:30 - Toronto Chamber Choir – a concert of music by Heinrich Schutz at the Church of the Redeemer, 162 Bloor Street West. Tickets are $35:00 and are available at the door. (Don Anderson, Michael and Heather Brett Crisp are members)

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 4th, 2022 - 3:00 – A Christmas Carol – a reading, at Beaches Presbyterian Church

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 11th, 2022 - 7:30 - Beach Chorale present The Messiah at Kingston Road United Church. Tickets available from Susan Kopulos or at the door. ( Susan and George Kopulos and Peter McKinnon are members)

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 13th, 2022 - Toronto Community Orchestra – 7:30 – a concert at East End United Church (formerly Eastminster) Danforth just west of Chester. Including Mozart’s The Marriage of Figaro and Eine Kleine Nachtmusic as well as some Christmas favourites. This is a Free Concert. (Susan Kopulos is a member.)

MORE SIGNAGE:

Something went wrong in Jet Crash, Expert says!!

Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers!!

Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over …

Miners refuse to work after death …

Juvenile Court to try shooting defendant …

War dims hope for peace …

If strike isn’t settled quickly, it may last awhile …

Advent is coming – be ready … and don’t forget to change your clocks MB

October 27, 2022

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 27th, 2022 - “If ever there is a tomorrow, when we are not together. There is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we are apart, I’ll always be with you.”
Winnie the Pooh

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 29th, 2022 - Historic walk along Queen Street East with Gene Domagala – 1:00 – meet at Beaches Library.

AND Jazz Vespers at Hope United Church – Main & Danforth – 4:30 – featuring Beachside Brass, a variety of jazz, pop, and funk.

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 30th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person please, masks are optional – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: When the war in Ukraine started, Irina’s family was torn apart. Her husband joined the territorial defence force to serve his country, while Irina and their two children sought refuge at her parents house. The sound of bombs exploding nearby made it clear that the situation was still unsafe and Irina was determined to find a safer place for her family. On their way to the evacuation point, bombs started falling on the settlement. Irina was fortunate to see a convoy of cars passing by, which her family hastily joined. Eventually, they were able to catch a train to western Lviv, where they found safe shelter at a refugee centre run by Hungarian Interchurch Aid through the ACT Alliance, supported by PWS&D.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 31st, 2022 - HAPPY HALLOWEEN – AND Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2nd, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the Prayer Room at 9:30.

THE WORD – For the word of God in scripture, for the word of God among us, for the word of God within us.

Thanks be to God.

AND FROM THE NITWITS! Signage …..

Toilet out of order, please use floor below ..

IN A LAUNDROMATt: Automatic washing machines: please remove all your clothes when the light goes out! ..

IN A LONDON DEPARTMENT STORE: Bargain basement upstairs ..

In AN OFFICE: Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken ..

ON A LEAFLET: If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons ..

ON A REPAIR SHOP DOOR: We can repair anything. (please knock hard on the door – the bell doesn’t work) ..

MAN KILLS SELF BEFORE SHOOTING WIFE AN DAUGHTER: This was caught in the SGV Tribune and they called the editorial room to ask who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible …. They put a correction in the paper the next day….

Have a good week, be careful, it’s still out there. MB

October 20, 2022

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 20th, 2022 - “Old age is like everything else … to make a success of it you’ve got to start young.” Fred Astaire

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 23rd, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – masks optional – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

Refreshments to be provided by Tineka Jorritsma

MISSION CAPSULE: The importance of elders who serve in congregational leadership is often understated. But the Bible describes elders as playing a very important role – they are leaders that Christ has appointed to oversee the church. Elders are at the heart of Cariboo Presbyterian House Church Mission in British Columbia, continually providing prayer, comfort and support to the congregation and community. The authentic and humble ways in which the elders live out their faith is a compelling testimony and example for other members. Their wisdom teaches about God’s deep love and purpose for their lives. Presbyterians Sharing … supports congregations serving remote communities.

WORD PUZZLE - What is the meaning of the word “Derecho” - 1. A musical term meaning “to repeat”,
2. unusually chatty 3. An echo that keeps repeating 4. A damaging windstorm 5. Flexible

MONDAY, OCTOBER 24th, 2022 - VOTING DAY

MONDAY, OCTOBER 24th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 26th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

Sunday, October 23rd, is the anniversary of Chanie Wenjack, who died of hunger and exposure in 1966 after running away from the Cecilia Jeffrey Indian Residential School, which the Presbyterian Church in Canada operated. We pray for Survivors and all those who carry deep pain and trauma from that experience.

WORD PUZZLE. The correct response is #4. A damaging windstorm. The full definition is “a line of intense, widespread, and fast moving windstorms and sometimes thunderstorms, that moves across a great distance and is characterized by damaging winds.”

The “na na na” and “la la la” which don’t really have any meaning in the lyrics of any song, are called vocables.

When you combine an exclamation mark with a question mark ( ?! ) it is referred to as an interrobang.

The armhole in clothes, where the sleeves are sewn, is called armscye.

The condition of finding it difficult to get out of bed in the morning is called dysania.

Illegible hand writing is called griffonage.

The dot over an “I” or a “j” is called a tittle.

SO THERE!

Have a good week. MB

October 13, 2022

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 13th, 2022 - “All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous unpremeditated act without the benefit of experience.” Henry Miller

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 14th, 2022 - Councillor Candidates Meeting for Beaches East York – Hope United Church, Main & Danforth 7:00 pm

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 16th, 2022 - Councillor Candidates Meeting for Beaches East York – Kingston Road United Church, 7:00 pm – Moderated by Alan Carter of Global News.

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 16th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Masks optional – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

Refreshments offered by Sheila MacDonald and Marlene Barnett …..

A reminder - the Scotiabank Waterfront Marathon will be happening this Sunday morning. If you are commuting to the church please note that Queen Street East, the Gardiner and parts of Lakeshore will be closed to cars.

MISSION CAPSULE: In Pakistan, after repeated and prolonged droughts, Rano and her husband, Jeevo, were left with land that was unable to produce a harvest. As they were contending with worries about how they would feed their family, the situation turned worse when Jeevo’s mother died, and they had to take on significant debt in order to pay for the funeral expenses. Jeevo went to Karachi to work, while Rano purchased food and necessities for the family on credit. Unfortunately, Jeevo’s earnings were only enough to pay their debt and nothing else. Things finally improved when Rano and Jeevo’s family were selected to be part of a PWS&D food assistance project, where they received food packages of oil, wheat, rice, sugar, tea and salt. As a church our Christian response to hunger is put into action through PWS&D and Canadian Foodgrains Bank.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 17th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00 via Zoom

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 19th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

A LITTLE HISTORY: Several years ago the congregation would take on a Lenten Project, oddly enough, during Lent. The painting at the front of the sanctuary was one of those projects. Every Sunday the board would be set up at the front of the sanctuary with a good supply of paints and brushes and everyone was invited to paint one of the taped off areas to represent a prayer. It took many Sundays and finally, when completed, Tim removed all the tape to reveal the white lines. One of the things that the event accomplished was to make us a little more aware of our prayers and how we imagine them.

Please keep in mind our Pantry at the Glen Manor entrance.

THINGS YOU NEVER NEEDED TO KNOW ….

The cry of a new born is called a vagitus.

The prongs on a fork are called tines.

The tiny plastic table placed in the middle of a pizza box is called a box tent.

The day after tomorrow is called overmorrow.

Your tiny toe or finger is called minimus

The wired cage that holds the cork in a bottle of champagne is called an agraffe.

So there!

Have a good week, come to Church it’s better when we are together. MB

October 5, 2022

OCTOBER 6th, 2022 - “Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you have to start young.”
Fred Astaire

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 9th, 2022 - Join us for morning Jazz worship at 10 – masks are optional. We will celebrate communion. Refreshments will be served following worship.

OCTOBER BIRTHDAYS - Nora Hiraishi

REFLECTIONS ON THE BOARDING HOMES MINISTRY

The first I heard of the Boarding Homes Ministry was when Rev. Rodger Hunter came to Beaches to speak about it. There was one part of his talk that stuck with me. He said the people who live in these homes are some of the most forgotten people in our society. I joined the group that very Sunday.

We were assigned to a home on Edgewood Ave in the Beach. With some guidance from Rodger we showed up with snacks and sat in a common room of the home. It was awkward at first. Only 2 or 3 would show up and they didn’t really want to talk. As time passed friendship and trust set in and the guys welcomed our arrival and more came to join us. One of the residents who was the most quiet was the one who would open the door to let us in with a big smile on his face. I’m not sure if it was all the cookies we consumed but we had some lively discussions. We talked about everything - current events, sports, religion. In some cases they shared very personal stories and some of those were heartbreaking. We weren’t there to counsel, just to listen and offer prayers.

One important aspect of our visits was music. After some chatting and a few snacks the guitar and songbooks would come out. This is part of the ministry I miss the most. I had put together my own songbook filled with a mix of uplifting pop and gospel songs. These songs brought a positive energy into the room. Not all the men would sing along, some would sit quietly and read the lyrics. Once in awhile the music would draw out one of the staff members who would sit and join us. I was always glad when they took part as I’m sure their job was not easy.

As a religious based group the gospel was also part of our discussions and of course a big part of the music. I never felt we were there to proselytize but we certainly had many talks about religion. I wanted to hear about their own experiences with the church if they had any and we would share our own. We ended every visit with a prayer and they were always respectful of that whether they believed or not. Those moments of prayer were some of the most deeply felt I have ever experienced.

Our church team and two homes as Edgewood was sold and the residents scattered to live at other homes. That was deeply saddening as we had developed a real bond with the guys there. So we made new friends at the home on Enderby Ave. It took a bit longer to connect at this home as it was larger and the guys mostly stayed in their rooms. Not sure if it was the snacks, the music or just curiosity but they slowly emerged to join us. Our experiences were very similar at this home. Friendships were made, prayers were said, songs were sung, snacks were consumed and topics were discussed. We also had a lot of laughs which is also important.

The other aspect of this ministry that should be mentioned was how it brought together the members of our congregation who were involved. We had a fantastic team and I think we will always miss being together as part of this group. I don’t know yet what type of service the Lord has planned for me in the future but I will be forever thankful that I was steered towards this one.

Respectfully submitted, your brother in Christ. Tim Murray

MONDAY, OCTOBER 10th, 2022 - Theology on Tap usually meets at 7:00 via Zoom but as this is a holiday I am not sure.

TUESDAY, OCTOBER 11th, 2022 - Funeral Service for Stephen vonGemmingen at 11:30

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 12th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the Prayer Room.

MORE STUFF:

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies room during a dance.

Tigers have striped skin not just striped fur.

On average, in your lifetime you will spend approximately six months waiting at red lights.

It is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

Leonardo DaVinci invented scissors.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

Happy Thanksgiving - MB

September 30, 2022

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 30th, 2022 - “I handed in a script last year and the studio didn’t change one word. The word they didn’t change was on page 87.” Steve Martin

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 1st, 2022 - Jazz & Reflection at Beach United Church – 4:30 – featuring Jane Bunnett and Danae Olano

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 30th, 2022 – 6:00 – 9:00 / SATURDAY, OCTOBER 1st, 2022 - 10:00 – 3:00 - Beach Guild of Fine Art Show and Sale at Beach United Church.

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 2nd, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – masks are optional – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. Blessing of animals – in person or photos.

MISSION CAPSULE: After Mikabens’s first birthday in Haiti, his health began to deteriorate rapidly, showing signs of severe malnutrition. His parents brought him to the hospital, where he was diagnosed with severe acute malnutrition and was admitted for therapeutic nutrition treatment. He has since gained close to two kilograms and will shortly be able to return home. PWS&D along with Partners in Health and Canadian Foodgrains Bank is helping many young children in Haiti overcome critical malnutrition.

A LITTLE BEACHES HISTORY. Approximately 20-22 years ago, a young Korean woman contacted libraries, churches etc all over the world to put in place a movement which would encourage children to draw pictures telling what they thought about the world, about God, about what they wanted to be when they grew up. Each child was to draw on an 8” x 11” paper. These drawing were submitted and reduced in size to about four inches square and mounted on wood. The end result was a display at the United Nations in New York City. Mary Rae Shantz was part of our Sunday School at the time and she had our children submit their drawings. I happened to be in New York and went to see the display. It was something I will never forget. Thousands of drawings from almost every country. Canada submitted a great number. The children’s messages were full of hope for the future. My friend and I thought we would spend perhaps an hour, but we couldn’t stop looking at them all and were there for many hours. I found the drawings that our Beaches children had submitted – and that was exciting to see.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 3rd, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00 via Zoom

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 5th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30.

COMING UP: SUNDAY, OCTOBER 9th, 2022 - JAZZ SERVICE

STUFF:

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

Typewriter is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: abstemious and facetious

There are more chickens than people in the world.

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

The words ‘racecar’ ‘kayak’ and ‘level’ are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left.

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

The sentence, “The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog” uses every letter of the alphabet.

Have a good week MB

September 22, 2022

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 22ND, 2022 - “Never look down on anybody, unless you are helping him up.” Jesse Jackson

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 25th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 - in person – masks can be worn or not, it’s up to you and your comfort level - Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

AFTER SERVICE REFRESHMENTS TODAY WILL BE OFFERED BY DON ANDERSON.

Word game: “Voldemorting”

Which one of these is the correct definition: 1. To avoid using a name or word. 2. A type of wild boar. 3. To cast a spell on someone. 4. Hunting for voldemorts. 5. Writing in code.

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 26th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 28th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

COMING UP: Thanksgiving Sunday – Jazz Service

Beaches is happy to be taking part in the Toronto Little Free Pantries Project. At the front of the building along Glen Manor there is a wooden pantry where you can donate any non-perishable food items for people in need in our community.

The answer to the word game is #1. To avoid using a name or word.

AND NOW FOR THE SILLY

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore

When chemists die, they barium

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can’t put it down

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Velcro – what a rip off!

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus

Broken pencils are pointless

Have a good week - MB

September 15, 2022

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 15th, 2022 - “A woman is like a teabag - you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.” Eleanor Roosevelt

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 17TH & SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 18th, 2022 - Beach Studio Tour Show and Sale, 11:00 am - 6:00 pm featuring 13 Artists and Artisans.

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 18th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person – there is lots of room – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

Last Sunday’s pot luck luncheon was a big success – it was nice to see people going from table to table visiting and catching up with each other. A great start.

Hospitality - Susan and George Kopulos will be hosting this week.

MISSION CAPSULE: Presbyterian World Service & Development (PWS&D) works to improve the quality of life for people living with disabilities. John, who had a limb amputated when he was younger, is a participant in a livelihoods program at the Garu Community Based Rehabilitation Centre. As a participant, John was able to attend a workshop on vegetable production. “I can’t thank the program and their partners, like PWS&D enough. I can produce enough food now to feed myself and my family because of the training and the seed that I received from the program. Thankfully, the training and the seed I received came at the right time and has proven to be the game-changer. Thank you so much for the timely intervention” shared John. This livelihoods program with the Garu Community Based Rehabilitation Centre is supported by PWS&D through the Presbyterian Church of Ghana.

NOTE: Beaches is looking to replace our weed-eater. Ours is old and broken – does anyone happen to have an old one that they would like to donate to help with property upkeep? …

A STORY: While watching many hours of the coverage of the Queen this week, I saw an interview with one of her photographers who has been with her for many years. The event took place at Balmoral and as it has been open to tourists for some time, on one of those days this happened. An American couple were there with other tourists and happened – by mistake – to wander into the flower garden. The Queen happened to be there along with the photographer. The photographer had left her alone to enjoy the garden when he noticed the couple approaching her. The man walked up to her and commented on what a great estate this was and how pleased they were to be in Scotland and how they were not expecting it to be so beautiful. While he rambled on, a staff member witnessed this and quickly came along to stand beside the Queen. The American handed her his cell phone and asked if she would take their picture, which she did, and then took hers. Then he said, “is it true the Queen lives here”? She said yes, and he said “have you ever met her?” She replied, “no, but he has!” The couple left and the staff member said to the Queen and the photographer, “I would like to be a fly on the wall when they go home and show these pictures and someone tells them that it was the Queen.”

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 19th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00 via Zoom.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 21st, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the prayer room.

COMING UP - SUNDAY, OCTOBER 2nd, 2022 - Blessing of Animals…. (if you wish you can bring a photograph of your pet)

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 9th, 2022 - Jazz Service

One nice thing about egoists is they don’t talk about other people.

If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

If a turtle doesn’t have a shell – is it homeless or naked?

Is there another word for synonym?

If a deaf child signs swear words does it’s mother wash it’s hands with soap?

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

I went into a book shop and asked where the help section was. The saleswoman said, if I told you it would defeat the purpose.

Have a good week MB

September 9, 2022

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 9th , 2022 - “When someone is impatient, and says, “I haven’t got all day,” I always wonder, how can that be? How can you not have all day? George Carlin

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 11th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. We will celebrate communion. If you are choosing to stay at home and join by Zoom, have at the ready some bread and wine/juice.

Following service we will be gathering for a Welcome Back Pot Luck Lunch – do plan to be there and bring something to share.

MISSION CAPSULE: Inspired by the early apostles, the Rev. Mike Veenema launched REACH, a ministry that takes place on the streets, screens, homes and public institutions of Nova Scotia’s Annapolis Valley. REACH focuses on gathering people to worship and become disciples of Jesus Christ. Central to this ministry is Mike's willingness to go out and draw people together in worship where they are. As the Rev. Mike himself described, “whether they are in custody, in long-term care, struggling on the streets, or in their homes, I go to where they are.” Mike receives coaching and training support through Cyclical PCC, a church-planting initiative that is supported by gifts to Presbyterians Sharing…

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 12th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will get together via Zoom at 7:00 - the new book is Jewish and Christian Women in the Ancient Mediterranean

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 14th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the Prayer Room at 9:30

PLAN AHEAD: SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 17th, 2022 - Music for the Soul at Beach United 4:30 – 5:00 featuring Rebekah Hawker with Michael Eckert.

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 18th, 2022 - Terry Fox Run Beaches – Register 8:30 Start 9:00

SATURDAY & SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 17th & 18th, 2022 - Beach Studio Tour featuring 13 artists and artisans. 11:00 - 6:00
Info – www.beachstudiotour.ca

AND …

Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly, because communication is key.

Diet tip: eat food off other people’s plates. Those are their calories – they don’t count.

I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

I changed my ipod’s name to titanic. It’s syncing now.

They told me I had type A blood, but it was a typo.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer.

Why is there an expiry date on sour cream?

Whose cruel idea was it for the word ‘lisp’ to have an ’s’ in it.

Have a good week - MB

September 2, 2022

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 2nd, 2022 - “Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened.” -- Winston Churchill

HAPPY LABOUR DAY WEEKEND …

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 4th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – do come in person – Cole Kim leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: Vanea is 15 years old and lives in Malawi with her parents and four siblings. When Vanea finished primary school, she wrote an entrance exam for secondary school and was selected to attend the Neno Girls School, supported by the PCC through PWS&D. Sadly, Vanea’s parents could not afford the school fees and she was forced to withdraw. PWS&D recognizes the importance of education for young girls to achieve their dreams and gain self-confidence. PWS&D provides scholarships for orphans and vulnerable girls in Malawi to attend the Neno Girls School, who otherwise could not afford to due to financial constraints. Vanea was one of the students selected for this scholarship and is now completing her high school education.

SEPTEMBER BIRTHDAYS - Sheila MacDonald, Jackie Ogier and Emma Kraay

JUST BECAUSE: I was on Queen Street this week and noticed all the empty stores – sad – AND the barbershop just east of Waverley on the north side, that has been boarded up for many years, is finally gone and work is being done.

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 5th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will NOT be meeting this week. BUT - the group will be gathering again on September 12th via Zoom. M.J. will be joining in from Nova Scotia. We will be reading the book “Jewish and Christian Women in the Ancient Mediterranean.” There are still a couple of people who have not picked up a copy – I will leave them with Erin. M.J.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 7th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the prayer room

MARK YOUR CALENDARS FOR:

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 11th, 2022 - Welcome back Potluck Lunch.

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 2nd, 2022 - Blessing of Animals service

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 9th, 2022 - Jazz Service

The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption!

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

Don’t join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects.

The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it’s still stationery.

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization!!

Have a good week MB

August 25, 2022

THURSDAY, AUGUST 25th, 2022 - “Let a smile be your umbrella and you’ll end up with a face full of rain!” George Carlin

SUNDAY, AUGUST 28th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – come in person – Cole Kim preaching.

MISSION CAPSULE: The Respite Ministry of St. Columba – a parish of the Presbyterian Church of Mauritius – supports families who care for people with intellectual and physical challenges by giving guardians and family members an opportunity to have a break while trained volunteers help take care of their children or dependents. Presbyterians Sharing … supported renovations to make the parish more accessible, including modifying washrooms and installing ramps where there were only stairs. The Rev. Rodney Curpanen of St. Columba shared, “We are very grateful for the support extended to us by the Presbyterian Church in Canada that enriches and heightens our hospitality ministries to strangers, poor, needy and marginalized. Thank you for your partnership.”

Anyone ever used the word “Spuddle”? It could be –
1. A wonky lawn mower wheel.
2. To work ineffectively.
3. A slang word for insomnia
4. To spin your wheels on wet ground.
5. To weave on a loom.

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 31st, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

We are happy to be taking part in the Toronto Little Free Pantries Project. There is a beautiful wooden pantry on Glen Manor at our front door. You can donate any non-perishable food items for the community.

Spuddle - the correct answer is #2 – to work ineffectively, or to be extremely busy while achieving absolutely nothing…

Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

When you’ve seen one shopping centre you’ve seen a mall.

If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.

When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she’d dye.

Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

Acupuncture: a jab well done.

Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.

Have a good week - MB

August 18, 2022

THURSDAY, AUGUST 18th, 2022 - “Somebody has to do something, and it’s just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us”
Jerry Garcia

SUNDAY, AUGUST 21, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading….

MISSION CAPSULE: When the Taliban took control of Afghanistan in August 2021, an atmosphere of uncertainty prevailed. Among the many issues that have surfaced since the Taliban takeover are rapidly spreading hunger and restrictions to education. International sanctions on the Taliban make it challenging to provide assistance in Afghanistan. When possible, PWS&D provide emergency food assistance with the support of other members of Canadian Foodgrains Bank PWS&D’s partner in Afghanistan has also established 12 education centres to safely support students while restrictions on education are in place.

MONDAY, Theology on Tap …….will not be meeting again until Monday, September 12th, 2022

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 24th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the Prayer Room …

SUNDAY, AUGUST 21ST – TO SUNDAY AUGUST 27th, 2022 - Presbyterian Music Camp will meet this year after a Covid break.
This is their 50th Anniversary - and a good time will be had by all

More Moron the same theme:

The guy who fell onto in upholstery machine was fully recovered.

A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.

You are stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.

He broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.

A calendar’s days are numbered.

A lot of money is tainted: ‘Taint yours, and ‘taint mine.

A boiled egg is hard to beat.

He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

The short fortune teller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.

Have a good week - MB

August 12, 2022

FRIDAY, AUGUST 12th, 2022 - “Moving fast is not the same as going somewhere.” Robert Anthony

SATURDAY, AUGUST 13th, 2022 - 11:00 am – 10:00 pm – Wheels on the Danforth Street Festival. Danforth Avenue and Danforth Road. Lots of entertainment, vendors, food, buskers, lots of wheels. In support of Wounded Warriors Canada

SUNDAY, AUGUST 14th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – do join in person – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. We will celebrate communion.

MISSION CAPSULE: The Raw Carrot Soup Enterprise is a growing social enterprise that is doing so much more than making soup - it is changing lives by employing individuals living with disabilities and mental illness. Meagan is one of the many people who have found meaningful employment at the Raw Carrot. Her work has helped her to gain confidence and skills and to feel proud of who she is and what she can contribute. Meagan is a huge Raw Carrot fan, as she put it, “The world should have more Raw Carrots, not just because they have good soup, but because it’s a good place to work.” With support from Presbyterians Sharing … The Raw Carrot is transforming lives.

AUGUST BIRTHDAYS - Bruce Dinsmore; Bill vanZanden, Lori Gemmell

MONDAY, AUGUST 13th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 17th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the Prayer Room at 9:30

NOTE: Cole Kim, our student, will be leaving us the beginning of September. He has been reassigned to another church. We wish him well with his studies and his future. Before he leaves us he will be preaching while Katherine is on vacation.

FARMERS MARKET at Fairmont Park – Wednesday’s 3:30 – 7:00 – celebrate local food – market runs until October 6th, 2022.

OUTDOOR MOVIE NIGHTS at Kew Gardens – Wednesdays from sunset to 11:00 - www.facebook.com/makewaves.TO

MORON THE SAME THEME….

A bicycle can’t stand alone - it is two tired.

A will is a dead giveaway –

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana –

A backward poet writes inverse –

In a democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism, it’s your Count that votes –

A chicken crossing the road – poultry in motion –

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress -

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds -

Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I’ll show you A-flat minor.

Have a good week - MB

August 4, 2022

THURSDAY, AUGUST 4th, 2022 - “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” The Dali Lama

FRIDAY, AUGUST 5TH, SATURDAY AUGUST 6th, 2022 - Riverdale Art Show & Sale at Saint Barnabas Anglican Church, 361 Danforth Ave. Friday 6:00 – 9:00, Saturday 11:00 – 6:00 – art works by local artists.

SUNDAY, AUGUST 7th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – do come in person – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: Conflicts in Yemen, Syria, Afghanistan and, most recently, Ukraine have caused mass displacement of millions of people. As a result, many struggle to make ends meet and severely lack food, causing some to experience extreme hunger and malnutrition. Through PWS&D the church is responding to these urgent needs. In Syria, food baskets are provided to internally displaced people and their host communities. In Yemen, local partners supply food vouchers to help the most vulnerable families meet their basic needs. In response to the war in Ukraine, food assistance is being provided to those displaced in the country as well as to those who have fled to neighbouring countries. This emergency food assistance is done in collaboration with its ecumenical partners at Canadian Foodgrains Bank, where funds are matched.

MONDAY, AUGUST 8th, 2022 - Theology on Tap gather at 7:00 via Zoom

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 10th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group gather in the prayer room at 9:30

NOTE: Please keep our “Little Free Pantries Project” in mind – this morning it was completely empty. It is attracting community attention and local residents have been participating quite regularly. You can donate any non-perishable food items for people in need.

AND - Please keep our declining financial position in mind. Throughout COVID and the many months when we did not come to church in person our weekly givings dropped drastically. We are now in a position of playing catch up.

AND MORE WORDS

TOOTHACHE - The pain that drives you to extraction

TOMORROW - One of the greatest labour saving devices of today

YAWN - An honest opinion openly expressed

WRINKLES - Something other people have, similar to my character lines

Have a good week MB

July 28, 2022

THURSDAY, JULY 28th, 2022 - “ It is possible to fill the mind with millions of facts and still be entirely uneducated.”
Alec Bourne

SUNDAY, JULY 31st, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person please – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

SUNDAY, JULY 31st, 2022 - Jim and Arvilla are welcoming people from Beaches to an “open back yard” from 2:00 – 4:00 this afternoon. This is to celebrate Jim’s new book – they are 204 Ashdale Avenue, just south of Gerrard & the public library on the north west corner. …. East of Coxwell.

MISSION CAPSULE: God has done amazing things at Montreal West Presbyterian Church in Quebec! Over the past few years, with support from Presbyterians Sharing … the church has transitioned into a thriving multicultural ministry filled with energy and hope. Though the congregation has already done much good work in bringing a new vision and vitality to the church, they aren’t stopping there. They have their sights set to the future, wholeheartedly embracing youth ministry and seeing and treating their youth as the leaders of tomorrow. This new focus on youth ministry has youth participating in all levels of governance and worship leadership and the transformation continues.

A MESSAGE FROM OUR CLERK OF SESSION

Session Position and Plans for Hybrid Worship at Beaches.
Over the past couple of months we have received communications from members of the congregation expressing some dissatisfaction with the experience of the Sunday morning worship both from the standpoint of those attending remotely and those attending in person. Session has spent a lot of time discussing and grappling with the various issues involved and it seemed right to share our current position and plans with the congregation along with some of the thinking behind it.

When the pandemic hit we took the position that we would offer Sunday worship in a way that was accessible to as many of the congregation as possible as lockdown restricted not only our ability to gather, but also to travel outside our homes. For this reason we started simply using a conference call facility. As other remote meeting options became more familiar and available we moved to a Zoom service, with music prepared and recorded beforehand for the services, but with readings and the sermon in real time so as to emphasise the ability of all to participate, rather than to just view proceedings. We even instituted virtual breakout rooms so as to maintain contact among those who joined in with worship. As time went on the slide show presentation evolved so that the virtual experience was enhanced. Many people contributed to this effort and it proved very successful.

We now find ourselves in a very different situation. While the pandemic is not done, most of the restrictions to travelling and meeting have been removed. The focus of official public health guidance is on individuals taking actions to reduce their risk of serious symptoms by maintaining an up-to-date vaccination status and their risk of infection by masking or avoiding crowded spaces, especially if indoors. Many in the congregation miss the fellowship associated with worshipping and meeting in-person. The hybrid services endeavour to provide meaningful, in-person worship for those wishing to return to the Sanctuary while providing the option to continue remote participation for those who deem in-person worship too risky or difficult attend. The recent concerns have highlighted some of the shortcomings in our current approach necessitated by the compromise between the two options.

At the current stage of the pandemic, Session is determined to remain consistent with all public health guidelines as well as to maintain the principal of reaching as many members as possible. Our aim is to move forward now to emphasise in-person worship on a Sunday while still maintaining the option for remote participation. We want to demonstrate the activity and vitality of the congregation to our neighbouring community as well as to ourselves. Our approach is necessarily constrained by our ability as a small congregation to resource all that we would like to do; a small number of individuals have kept our virtual and hybrid services going for over 2 years and requests for others to help out have yielded only limited response.

Given the nature of the pandemic, Session has chosen to take a phased approach to in-person Sunday Worship and to assess the results of each phase prior to moving to the next. As well, while we are planning for the future, in the event of a significant change in the public health situation we will pivot to a “Plan B”.

For this next phase Session is not making any changes to our policy concerning vaccination or masking (both strongly encouraged), as well, the Sanctuary will continue to be marked off for social distancing and ventilation maximised by the use of open doors and windows. What we will do is:

Use the screen in the Sanctuary to broadcast the faces of the Zoom participants to those present in-person
Encourage all elders and most especially the Duty Elder for that month, to be present in the Sanctuary
Encourage all those reading in the service to be present in the Sanctuary (this is not intended to exclude any who make the decision to attend via Zoom). If reading remotely we request that the individual’s camera be turned on so that all can fully participate in the shared experience.
Sing hymns live in the Sanctuary
Have coffee available before the start of the Sunday service and refreshments afterwards for enjoying during fellowship inside or outside the church
Plan for the choir to return to in-person performing after Labour Day
Plan for a post-worship brunch for the first Sunday after Labour Day
Plan for a possible blessing of the pets service
Plan for a Thanksgiving pot-luck in association with donations for our little pantry

As always, Session welcomes your feedback. Michael Brett, Clerk of Session

MONDAY, AUGUST 8st, 2022 - Monday at 7.00,

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST, 3rd, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

NOTE: please keep in mind our Community Pantry at our front steps. There is lots of activity so far.

MORE FROM THE STELLA AWARDS.

Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas, garnered 4th place in the Stella’s when he was awarded $14,500. Plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbours beagle – even though the beagle was on a chain in it’s owner’s fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.

Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania wins third place because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500. after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the floor; Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.!!!

Have a good week - MB

June 3, 2022

FRIDAY, JUNE 3rd. 2022 - Ho Hum here we go again, another ford years……..

SUNDAY, JUNE 5th, 2022 - D-Day Parade and Memorial Service at St. John’s Norway. Parade begins at 1:00 at Norway Public School – marching along Kingston Road to St. John’s Cemetery.

SUNDAY, JUNE 5th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person or on Zoom - Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. This will be a special kind of service with music and readings.

MISSION CAPSULE: The Central Alberta Shared Ministry initiative is a collaborative partnership that enables support and resource sharing between Knox Presbyterian Church and West Park Presbyterian Church in Red Deer and St. Andrew’s Presbyterian Church in Innisfail. Together the three congregations are embarking on a journey of education about congregational vitality and are developing plans to renew their ministries. The aim of the partnership is to support one another as they work towards congregational health. Once the Shared Ministry has attained stability, the partnership will welcome a new congregation. It is through gifts to Presbyterians Sharing … that the Presbytery of Central Alberta is able to experiment with this model of ministry.

JUNE BIRTHDAYS - - Jay Stryker, Rosemary Brett-Horn, Pam Williamson, Alexander Murray, Julian Anderson Bowes, Kevin McCloskey

I was reading about Toronto’s early days this morning and came across this information. In 1901 yearly building permits amounted to 3.5 million and by 1909 they had risen to 18 million. Interesting …..

MONDAY, JUNE 6th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 8th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

The latest “Stella Awards”

For those of you who are unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81 year old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and sued McDonalds where she purchased the coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. These were awards for the most outlandish lawsuits in the U.S.

SEVENTH PLACE: Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

SIXTH PLACE: Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles won $74,000 plus medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman apparently didn’t notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal the hubcaps.

FIFTH PLACE: Terrence Dickson, of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn’t re-enter the house the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut.
Forced to sit for eight days and survive on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner’s insurance company claiming undue mental anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish.

Enjoy the week - MB

May 27, 2022

FRIDAY, MAY 27th, 2022 - “I have found that if you love life, life will love you back.” Arthur Rubinstein

AND – “The Flame Eternal.” A musical meditation for “Peace, Love and Understanding” at Kingston Road United Church – 7:30 pm – Written and produced by guitarist Mark Battenberg and featuring flute, cello and violin. This is a free event. Please bring non-perishable food items for the food bank and please wear a mask.

SUNDAY, MAY 29th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person, masked or on Zoom. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: In Ghana, 25 year old Dominic Anane was born with a congenital hearing disability. Like many in Ghana who have disabilities, Dominic was discriminated against. His family and community denied him formal education as a result of negative cultural attitudes associated with his disability. One day, Dominic was identified during a survey by a community based rehabilitation staff member and enrolled in a program where he was provided with a sewing machine and vocational training in tailoring and dressmaking. Today Dominic has established his own business and makes dresses for customer s in his community. Dominic expressed his gratitude “I feel privileged to have benefitted from the community based program, which has truly made my life meaningful.” This livelihood program is supported by the church through PWS&D.

MONDAY, MAY 30th, 2022 - Beaches-East York Candidates Meeting at Kingston Road United Church – 7:30 – 9:30 pm

MONDAY, MAY 30th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 1st, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 am in the Prayer Room

MAGPIES:

Cattle farmers aren’t terribly excited about magpies, as they will peck at a cow’s hide, looking for grubs and other parasites. Magpies are also known to be (1) mischievous, and (2) a problem for small animals and children – they will swoop down and attack anything they perceive as being a threat to them.

Remarkably, magpies can recognize the faces of as many as 30 people, which is the average number who live within a magpie’s territory. Very rarely do magpies attack more than one or two people out of the 30…it’s the same individual people that they attack each time. Why? It seems they perceive some individuals as threatening and if that’s you then you are in for it!

Magpies also have long memories. A research assistant reports being attacked upon his return after 15 years away from one bird’s territory. To give them their positive due, magpies have a beautiful song of extraordinary complexity. And they are smart. In fact, the Australian magpie is one of the cleverest birds on earth.

Recently, the results of scientific experiments were published in the journal Australian Field Ornithology. The study showed just how clever magpies really are and, in the process, revealed a highly unusual example in nature of birds helping one another without any apparent tangible benefit to themselves. Dominique Potvin, an animal ecologist at University of the Sunshine Coast in Australia, set out to study magpie social behavior. She and her team spent around six months perfecting a harness that would carry miniature tracking devices and thus track their behavior.

The birds flew off without any indication of distress, but then those wily magpies went to work to foil the plan. “The first tracker was off half an hour after we put it on,” Potvin said. “We were literally packing up our gear and watching it happen.” In a remarkable act of cooperation, the magpie wearing the tracker remained still while another magpie worked at the harness with its beak. Within 20 minutes, the helping magpie had found the only weak point – a single clasp, barely a millimeter long – and snipped it with its beak. Dr. Potvin and her team later saw different magpies removing harnesses from two other birds outfitted with them. Whereas it took the scientists six months to “perfect” the tracking devices, the magpies had removed all five with three days!

Interesting ….

Have a good week - MB

May 20, 2022

FRIDAY, MAY 20th, 2022 - “Some men see things as they are and ask Why? I dream things that never were and ask Why not?”
Robert F. Kennedy

SATURDAY, MAY 21st, 2022 - Historic Walk with Gene Domagala – 1:00 – meet at the NW corner of Woodbine and Danforth. See the site of one of the oldest hotel buildings in the area and hear stories of the Danforth. Learn about the Massey Harris estate.

SATURDAY, SUNDAY & MONDAY, MAY 21ST – 23rd, 2022 - Annual Spring Plant Sale at 14 Lyall Avenue. 10:00 - 6:00 each day. Garden perennials – to raise funds for local food banks etc.

SUNDAY, MAY 22nd, 2022 - Noon Hour Recital at Kingston Road United Church – 12:00 – Classical Guitar and Flute.

SUNDAY, MAY 22nd, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person, masked or on Zoom. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MONDAY, MAY 23rd, 2022 - Fireworks at Ashbridges Bay – 10:00

Anyone play Balderdash?? OK – the word is skelf – s k e l f …..

The definitions are; A sliver; A type of Shellfish, similar to a scallop; A cheater; A brash talker; A scraper. One of these is correct. You have to read to the bottom!!

MISSION CAPSULE: living Waters is a mission of the Presbytery of Lindsay-Peterborough that reaches out to marginalized people in downtown Peterborough. The Rev. Jonathan Baird regularly visits people living on the streets and invites them to the two drop-in programs that Living Waters Mission runs in partnership with the Bridge Youth Centre. The program offers meals, support, counseling and Christian fellowship. One woman, who struggles with mental health and addiction, expressed her appreciation. “I come here because it is the only place where I feel loved.”

MONDAY, MAY 23rd, 2022 - Theology on Tap meet regularly on Mon days at 7:00 via Zoom. I am not sure they will meet this coming Monday due to the holiday.

WEDNESDAY, MAY 25th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30

Well, Skelf is NOT a type of Shellfish; nor is it a cheater; or a brash talker; or a wood scraper; it turns out that is a sliver!!

AND for those of you who think they know everything ….

All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5.00 bill.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than it’s brain.

Babies are born without kneecaps - they don’t appear until the child reaches 2 – 6 years of age.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds. Dogs only have about ten.

“Dreamt” is the only English word that ends in the letters “mt”,

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

Have a good week - be alert, be masked – in my building we currently have 18 cases of COVID!!
MB

May 13, 2022

FRIDAY, MAY 13th, 2022 - “One of the great pleasures in life is doing what people say you cannot do” Author unknown

SUNDAY, MAY 15th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10 - Zoom or in person. In person requires a mask, Zoom requires coffee. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: In Malawi, unreliable rainfall patterns are a significant issue affecting farmers. As a result of climate change, these unpredictable rains greatly impact food security and limit what farmers can and cannot plant. To assist farmers in Malawi’s Karonga District, workshops that teach conservation agriculture techniques are held. Farmers learn how to use mulch and make compost to nourish the soil and grow better crops. Farmers also learn other essential techniques, including weed and pest management, to address the ongoing challenges of climate. Since implementing a conservation agriculture approach many farmers have increased their crop yields. This project us supported by PWS&D in partnership with Canadian Foodgrains Bank.

NOTE: We have a place for food contributions for the neighbourhood. It is found on Glen Manor at the base of the ramp.

MONDAY, MAY 16th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via Zoom at 7:00.

Wednesday, MAY 18th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in the prayer room at 9:30.

AND FOR THOSE WHO THINK THEY KNOW EVERYTHING……..

A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A crocodile cannot stick out it’s tongue

A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A “jiffy” is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

Al Capone’s business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

Have good week - MB

May 5, 2022

THURSDAY, MAY 5th, 2022 - I’M BACK – enjoy, I hope …..

SATURDAY, MAY 7th, 2022 - Jazz & Reflection at Beach United Church – 4:30 – featuring Laura Robinson, Paul Novotny and Ewen Farncombe. Performing Springtime with Joni – a Tribute to Joni Mitchell

SUNDAY, MAY 8th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. We will celebrate communion. In person worship requires masks. If you are joining us via Zoom have at the ready some bread and wine.

MISSION CAPSULE: Presbyterians Sharing … is transforming lives in Central America and Mexico. Based in Guatemala, General Coordinator Judith Castaneda and the staff of the Protestant Center for Pastoral Studies in Central America are empowering women and girls through their ministry of accompaniment. Women learn how to take on leadership roles in churches and their communities through faith-based activities about their personal and legal rights, and the importance of formal education. After completing CEDEPCA’s Healthy Relationships course, one woman said, “I feel like a different woman. Before I used to live locked in my home with a domestic routine, but now I have new friends and we do creative things.”

MONDAY, MAY 9th, 2022 - Theology on tap with gather at 7:00 via Zoom.

WEDNESDAY, MAY 11TH, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the Prayer Room

NOTE: Recently the Girl Guides and Brownie groups who meet at Beaches, and have for many years, along with our administrative staff, had a box built to hold food and/or other supplies. It has been attached to the ramp on Glen Manor. A week ago it was full, I noticed yesterday it is almost empty. If you feel like adding to it, it would be greatly appreciated.

AND THIS - Ten faith groups in Beaches East York are hosting a candidates meeting for the June 2nd Provincial election. People can attend the meeting in person at The Church of the Resurrection at 1100 Woodbine Avenue or on Zoom on Thursday May 12th at 7:00pm.

As people of faith we have a responsibility : to create a more just and equitable world; To care for one another and for successive generations, and, to protect and preserve God’s creation.

These responsibilities oblige us to shape how we live in our community, how we value people who are vulnerable and how we tend to creation. The meeting will give us a chance to hear the ideas of the various candidates and political parties on important issues, like – Housing and Homelessness; Environment and Climate Change; Education; and Health Care. To attend the event in person or on Zoom, register at www.therez.ca/election

OUR ENGLISH LANGUAGE CAN BE CONFUSING:

The English language has some wonderfully anthropomorphic collective nouns for the various groups of animals.

We are all familiar with a – Herd of Cows, A Flock of Chickens, A School of Fish, a Gaggle of Geese and a Pride of Lions.

However, less widely known is – A Murder of Crows, An Exaltation of doves, and presumably because they look so wise – A Congress of Owls. Now consider a group of Baboons - - they are the loudest, most dangerous, most obnoxious, most viciously aggressive and least intelligent of all primates…. And what is the proper collective noun for a group a baboons? A Parliament. Yes, A Parliament of Baboons! Think about it!

Have a good week MB

April 1, 2022

FRIDAY, APRIL 1st, 2022 -- “I don’t deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don’t deserve that either.” Jack Benny

APRIL 1st – 24th, 2022 - Beach Guild of Fine Art Spring show online. https://beachartguildshowandsale.ca

SATURDAY, APRIL 2nd, 2022 - 4:30 - Jazz & reflection: Featuring Alison Young and Jeff McLeod – Saxaphone and Piano. This will be an “in person” event…..Beach United Church

b>SUNDAY, APRIL 3rd, 2022 - Join us – IN PERSON – for morning worship at 10:00. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. Masks will be worn.

MISSION CAPSULES: The earth’s ecosystems are dynamic, diverse and awe-inspiring. All creatures rely on them for our lives and well-being. But the delicate balance that maintains a climate comfortable for humans and other creatures is changing. Greenhouse gasses, such as carbon dioxide, emitted by human beings through the combustion of fossil fuels, are warming the earth’s surface and the oceans. The impacts of climate change are being felt all over the world. The church acknowledges that: global warming represents one of the most serious global environmental challenges to the health, security and stability of human life and natural ecosystems. Our climate is a public good and all humanity is responsible for taking care of it, especially those who live in countries that produce a disproportionate share of greenhouse gasses.

APRIL BIRTHDAYS: Jack Locke; Jonathan Brett-Horn; Jonathan Williamson; Mary Rae Shantz

MONDAY, APRIL 4th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather by Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 6th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather – in person – at 9:30.

SUNDAY, APRIL 10th, 2022 - Palm Sunday Service - this will be a Jazz Service.

THURSDAY, APRIL 14th, 2022 - Maundy Thursday service – in person – we are in discussion about holding our pot luck soup; bread and fruit dinner. More later.

FRIDAY, APRIL 15th, 2022 - 10:00 - Good Friday service.

SUNDAY, APRIL 17th, 2022 - EASTER SERVICE

AND FROM THE COURTS:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?

WITNESS: All of them, the live ones put up too much of a fight!

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

ATTORNEY: and Mr. Denton was dead at the time?

WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.

Have a good week - MB

March 25, 2022

FRIDAY, MARCH 25th, 2022 - “If you have to have a job in this world, being a high priced movie star is a pretty good gig” Tom Hanks

SUNDAY, MARCH 27th, 2022 - Fourth Sunday in Lent - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person, with a mask – or on Zoom. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: In Nepal, Pallu Oli knew something wasn’t right when he felt a burning sensation on his leg. After seeing the doctor, Pallu was prescribed medicine but did not feel better after taking it. As his health worsened, Pallu wondered why he hadn’t healed yet. His son suggested that he visit the Shining Hospital. At the hospital, Pallu was diagnosed with leprosy and entered a treatment program (which he has since completed). Sharing his experience, Pallu expressed, “I am very happy that my disease is diagnosed and is treated accordingly” The Shining Hospital is supported by PWS&D.

COMING UP:

Palm Sunday – Jazz Service

Maundy Thursday Service

Good Friday Service

Easter Sunday Service

Beaches Easter Parade

POPULAR EXPRESSIONS - “To Beat about the Bush” To approach a matter indirectly or in a roundabout way. The expression has evolved from early hunting methods for catching birds. One team of hunters would approach the birds hiding in the undergrowth from the sides, so as to drive them into the path of another team, who would catch them with nets as they took off. This task of literally beating the bushes in which the birds take shelter is still an important part of pheasant shooting today.

“Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea” Caught between two evils or dangers, in a dilemma with nowhere to turn. This saying may be of nautical origin, the ‘devil’ being a term for a seam in the hull of a ship that ran along the waterline. A commonly used modern phrase with a similar meaning is ‘between a rock and a hard place’.

MONDAY, MARCH 28th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00 via Zoom

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 30th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather in person at 9:30

AND FROM THE COURTROOM - - -

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?

WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?

WITNESS He’s 20, much like your IQ

ATTORNEY: Where you present when your picture was taken?

WITNESS: Are you kidding me?

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?

WITNESS: Yes

ATTORNEY; and what were you doing at that time?

WITNESS: getting laid

ATTORNEY: She had three children right?

WITNESS: Yes

ATTORNEY: How many were boys?

WITNESS: None

ATTORNEY: Where there any girls?

WITNESS: Your Honour, I think I need a new attorney.

Have a good week: MB

March 18, 2022

FRIDAY, MARCH 18th, 2022 - “When Ginger Rogers danced with Astaire, it was the only time in the movies when you looked at the man, not the woman.” Gene Kelly

SATURDAY, MARCH 19th, 2022 - Music for the Harp with Kathryn Merriam at Beach United Church – 4:30 - Livestream / In person options to attend. Covid protocols will be followed.

SUNDAY, MARCH 20th, 2022 - Third Sunday in Lent - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person – Covid protocols will be followed – or on Zoom. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: Through gifts to Presbyterians Sharing … The Presbyterian Church in Canada is able to support many important outreach ministries associated with Cyclical PCC, a church planting support initiative. One such ministry is Cornerstone Ministries. They provide Christian hope and healing through innovative and supportive practices to struggling single moms and families in the Dunnville area of Ontario. Since moving most of their ministry work online, many more people have been positively impacted by Cornerstone. Through outreach, counselling and practical support, over 200 local families have come to know the God who loves them, helping them to blossom in faith, courage and wholeness.

THE BACK OF BEYOND - This is an Australian expression, nineteenth century in origin, which is now commonly used to describe any remote areas but which originally referred to the vast spaces of the interior of the country, the Great Outback. The ‘back” reduced from ‘back country’ is the outlying territory behind the settled regions, and the term, ‘backlock’ is found in 1850, referring to those territories of Australia split up by the government into blocks for settlement.

BALLPARK FIGURE: A financial North Americanism that has taken hold in Britain, this is an estimate, or a budget figure, which might better be described as a ‘guesstimate’. A ballpark is a large stadium built specifically for the game of baseball, and the phrase ‘in the same ballpark’ was originally used when two figures, the projected and the real figure, were reasonably close. Over time, the term has evolved so that the estimated figure is now known as a ‘ballpark figure’.

MONDAY, MARCH 21st, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00 via Zoom

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 23rd, 2022 - Beaches prayer Group will gather at 9:30 - in person

The following are taken from a book called Disorder in the American Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

ATTORNEY – What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS - He said, “Where am I Cathy?”
ATTORNEY - And why did that upset you?
WITNESS - My name is Susan!

ATTORNEY - What gear were you in at the moment of impact?
WITNESS - Gucci sweats and Reeboks

ATTORNEY - What is your date of birth?
WITNESS - July 18th,
ATTORNEY - What year?
WITNESS - Every year

ATTORNEY - How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS - Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.
ATTORNEY - How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS - Forty five years.

ATTORNEY - This myasstenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS - yes
ATTORNEY - and it what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS - I forget.
ATTORNEY - You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

Have a good week – see you in church - MB

March 11, 2022

FRIDAY, MARCH 11th, 2022 - “The best car safety device is a rearview mirror with a cop in it.” Dudley Moore

SATURDAY, MARCH 12th, 2022 - CLOCKS FORWARD TONIGHT –

SUNDAY, MARCH 13th, 2022 - SECOND SUNDAY IN LENT - Join us for morning worship at 10 – IN PERSON – or on Zoom. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. We will celebrate communion. If you are on Zoom have wine and bread ready. If you choose to join in person, masks are still required.

MISSION CAPSULES: In Afghanistan, Fatima had always dreamed of attending school. However most schools were far from her home and, as a girl, it was unsafe for her to travel to them. At the age of ten Fatima’s dreams finally came true. She learned about a school near her village and persuaded her father to enroll her. “After completing my studies, I will become a teacher and become a role model for other girls and women in our village,” Fatima shared. Though the current political situation in Afghanistan has left many children uncertain about their futures, Fatima prays that she will be able to continue her education beyond primary school. This education project is supported by PWS&D.

MORE FROM – Popular Expressions: ALL TARRED WITH THE SAME BRUSH - Everyone in the group shares the same failings; they are all sheep of the same flock. This old saying alludes to the methods used by farmers to mark their sheep. A brush dipped in tar was applied to the wool as a form of branding. The phrase is now often used when people feel they have been lumped in with others and judged unfairly as a result.

AND - Annus Horribilis - A particularly bad or miserable year, the phrase being Latin for Horrible year. It owes its popularity to Queen Elizabeth 11 who used it in a speech at a banquet in the Guild Hall, London in 1992 – the year which saw the divorce of the Princess Royal, the separations of the Prince and Princess of Wales and of the Duke and Duchess of York, and the devastating fire at Windsor Castle. The next day, the punning headline writers had a field day with The Sun proclaiming on the front page – ‘One’s Bum Year’.

Annus Horribilis was a play on a phrase with the opposite meaning – annus mirabilis, which was first used as the title of a poem by John Dryden (1631-1700) to describe the year 1666 which he saw as an example of miraculous intervention by God. It has ever since been used to describe particular years full of wonders, or achievements; 1759 was one such for the British in which they achieved a string of military successes. (in British naval history, 1759 is also known as the Year of Victories).

MONDAY, MARCH 14th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 16th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30 in the prayer room.

SILLY STUFF:

I’m at a place in my life where errands are starting to count as going out.

I don’t always go the extra mile, but when I do it’s because I missed my exit.

If you can’t think of a word just say, “I forgot the English word for it.” That way people will think you are bilingual instead of an idiot.

It’s weird being the same age as old people!

You don’t realize how old you are until you sit on the floor and then try to get back up.

Have a good week - MB

March 1, 2022

TUESDAY, MARCH 1st, 2022 - “We trust Sir, that God is on our side. It is more important to know that we are on God’s side.” Abraham Lincoln

Wednesday, MARCH 2nd, 2022 - First Day of Lent – Ash Wednesday Service – 7:00 – in person or on Zoom.

MISSION CAPSULE: Binda Devi lives in Karbola, India, with her husband and four children. A year ago, the family was living a comfortable life, relying on the income from her husband’s job as a labourer in a cement factory. However, one day, there was an accident that left him unable to work. With no income, the family was very worried. PWS&D staff met with the family and, together, they came up with a plan for Binda to start a small cosmetics business. With support from the program she is now selling cosmetic items from village to village. The business is going well and Binda provides for her family. This livelihood initiative is supported by PWS&D.

MARCH BIRTHDAYS -- Maureen Monk, Michael Brett, Tineke Jorritsma, Tom Allen, Gary Lyon, Marlene Barnett, Robyn Allin

SUNDAY, MARCH 6th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 – in person or on Zoom. Let’s gather and welcome each other back.
Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MONDAY, MARCH 7th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 9th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30.

DO YOU WANT TO FAST FOR LENT? In the words of Pope Francis

Fast from hurting words and say kind words.

Fast from sadness and be filled with gratitude.

Fast from anger and be filled with patience.

Fast from pessimism and be filled with hope.

Fast from worries and have trust in God.

Fast from complaints and contemplate simplicity.

Fast from pressures and be prayerful.

Fast from bitterness and fill your hearts with joy.

Fast from selfishness and be compassionate to others.

Fast from grudges and be reconciled.

Fast from words and be silent so you can listen.

Have a good week MB

February 25, 2022

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 25th, 2022 - “A life spent making mistakes is not only more honourable but more useful than a life spent in doing nothing.” George Bernard Shaw

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 26th, 2022 - 4:30 - Jazz Vespers from Beach United Church – online concert with the Jason Logue Sextet.
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/83178461579

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 27th, 2022 - Join us on zoom for morning worship at 10:00 – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

Following worship there will be a brief break and then our Annual General Meeting.

MISSION CAPSULE: ARISE Ministry is a Toronto based ministry that offers outreach, case management and spiritual care to individuals involved in the sex trade. In response to the explosion of the online sex trade in recent years, the staff and volunteers at ARISE have expanded their outreach ministry online through an app called “Freedom Signal” which has allowed them to communicate and establish relationships with victims of online sex trafficking and exploitation. This type of virtual outreach has meant that staff and volunteers have been able to connect people to resources and support in a way that is not always possible in street-level outreach. ARISE ministry receives support from Presbyterians Sharing …

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 2nd, 2022 - 7:30 - Ash Wednesday Service - in person and on Zoom

NOTE: We are reopening for in-person worship. Everyone must wear a mask or face covering at all times. All except those from the same household must maintain a physical distance of two meters from other individuals. Our capacity for in-person worship is limited to 45. Our Policy strongly recommends that all attending worship be fully vaccinated. We do not sing the hymns but all are invited to enjoy the recorded and live musical offerings.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 28th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will not be meeting this week. Since it is Ash Wednesday and will be the first in-person service, it seemed only fair to take a break for this week. It also gives people an extra week to get their books since we are ready to start the next one. For the next while we will continue to meet via Zoom as we have people from out of town who join and it means that they can continue to participate.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 2nd, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30

STUFF:

You are riding a horse at full speed, there is a Giraffe next to you and a Lion chasing you. What do you do?

Get off the Carousel!!

Breaking News! Man gets hit by a rental car. Said it Hertz.

What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.

What do you call an Irishman bounding off the wall? Rick O’Shay!

Bread is like the sun. It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist!

Have a good week - MB

February 18, 2022

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 18th, 2022 - When I was a kid I wanted to be older……..this is not what I expected!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 20th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 via Zoom – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

More from Spilling the Beans …..”All in a Day’s work” Said of an unusual task or unexpected task that can be obligingly included in the normal daily routine. The expression was common by the 18th century and may stem from the nautical use of the term ‘day’s work’, which referred to the reckoning of a ship’s course during the 24 hour period from noon one day to noon the next. A character in Sir Walter Scott’s (1771-1832) novel The Monastery (1820) says, “that will cost me a farther ride … but it is all in the day’s work”.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 21st, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 23rd, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30.

COMING UP: Sunday, February 27th, 2022 - Beaches Annual General Meeting following morning worship.

LENT – Lent begins with Ash Wednesday service and it has been discussed that we will go back to in person services from then on through Lent.

STUFF:

Why do French people eat snails? Because they don’t like fast food.

Lance is a very uncommon name nowadays but in medieval times people were called lance a lot!

What did the cow say to the calf? It’s pasture bedtime

Did you hear Julie Andrews will no longer endorse cheap lipstick? It crumbles easily and makes her breath smell. She explained, “The super colour fragile lipstick gives me halitosis”

Have a good week – soon it will be spring! MB

February 11, 2022

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 11th, 2022 - “The time to pray is not when we are in a tight spot but just as soon as we get out of it.” Josh Billings

FEBRUARY BIRTHDAYS - Klaas Kraay; Don Anderson; Liz van Zanden; Sybil Hiraishi; Carol Olson; Jerry Greer; Shelby Greer; Will Greenley; Nathan Greenley

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 13th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 via Zoom – Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading. We will celebrate communion - have ready some bread and wine.

WINTER STATIONS - launches February 21st and runs to March 31st along Woodbine Beach. This year’s theme is Resilience.

More from “Spilling the Beans” - “Alive and Kicking” The expression was coined in the late eighteenth century and probably referred originally to a healthy baby, either while still in the womb or just after birth. Appropriately, “Live and Kicking” became the title of a popular Saturday morning BBC TV children’s show in the 1990’s.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 14th, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via zoom at 7:00.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 16th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 27th, 2022 - Beaches Annual General Meeting will meet following morning worship.

COMING UP: Ash Wednesday service - the beginning of Lent. Session has been in discussion re the possibility of returning to in person worship during Lent and Easter.

AND FROM THE SIX YEAR OLDS –

Children should be seen and not . . . . . . . . spanked or grounded

When the blind lead the blind . . . . . . . . get out of the way

A bird in the hand . . . . . . . . is going to poop on you

Better late than . . . . . . . . pregnant

Have a good week - MB

February 4, 2022

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 4th, 2022 - WINTER OLYMPICS Yaaay

AND THIS - “Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups” George Carlin

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 6th, 2022 - Join us via Zoom for morning worship at 10:00 - Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

Note: Our dining room reopened yesterday, and today the library and all in person activities. We live in hope.

MISSION CAPSULE: Inspired by God’s promise of abundant life, PWS&D envisions a sustainable, compassionate and just world. This year marks 75 years of those values guiding us as we respond to hunger, poverty, injustice and disaster. Together we are working to support and empower people all over the world. Through PWS&D our church works with communities in our global village to restore human dignity, ease the pain of want and promote community cooperation that benefits all. Together, we are promoting human rights and supporting refugees. Faithful to our calling, we respond together.

And from – Popular Expressions – what they mean and where we got them………

According to Plan - A familiar expression that is frequently used ironically to describe things that did not go according to plan. It derives from falsely upbeat communiques issued during the First World War, often after a particularly bloody or shambolic operation, with the result that the phrase became associated with official attempts to cover up military incompetence and confusion. Such inverted use of language creates a coded understanding between those “in the know” strengthening the sense of camaraderie among those who suffer from such plans.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 7th, 2022 - Theology on Tap meets on Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 9th, 2022 - Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30

AND FROM THE SIX YEAR OLDS….

Happy the bride who . . . . . . . . gets all the presents

A penny saved is . . . . . . . . not much

Two’s company, three’s . . . . . . . . the Musketeers

Don’t put off till tomorrow what . . . . . . . . you put on to go to bed

There are none so blind as . . . . . . . . Stevie Wonder

If at first you don’t succeed . . . . . . . . get new batteries

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and . . . . . . . . you have to blow your nose

Have a good week - MB

January 28, 2022

FRIDAY, JANUARY 28th, 2022 - “The fact that I can plant a seed and it becomes a flower, share a bit of knowledge and it becomes another’s, smile at someone and receive a smile in return, are to me continual spiritual exercises.” Leo Buscaglia

SUNDAY, JANUARY 30th, 2022 - Join us for morning worship at 10:00 via Zoom or on your telephone. Rev. Katherine McCloskey leading.

MISSION CAPSULE: In October 2019, a devastating fire destroyed much of St. Matthew’s Presbyterian Church in Grand Falls-Windsor, Newfoundland. But, even with this loss and devastation weighing heavy on the hearts of the congregation, they still continued their outreach ministry to support the local community. During the pandemic, congregation members produced hats, mittens and incubator blankets for the local hospital and also supported the local Food Bank and Salvation Army. Now that the church building has been fully restored and the congregation is able to gather again, they continue to show love to their neighbours by exploring new opportunities for using and sharing their restored space. St. Matthew’s Presbyterian Church is supported by gifts to Presbyterians Sharing ….

And on the subject of Angels ….

Cherub – pronunciation – (CHER-uhb) Meaning: noun: A person, especially a child, with a sweet innocent appearance.

Etymology: From Latin cherubim, from Greek kheroubin, from Hebrew kerubim. Ultimately from the Semitic root krb (to praise). Earliest documented use – 825

Notes: The plural is cherubs or cherubim. Cherubim are the second highest order of angels. Do you know your angelology? Angelology is the branch of theology concerning the study of angels. Angels have their own celestial hierarchy (and you thought they were above this) with nine levels that go, from lowest to highest.

Angels, Archangels, Principalities, Powers, Virtues, Dominions, Thrones, Cherubim, Seraphim.

Best to memorize the order – never know where it might come in handy. Also, if you are in the market for a guardian angel, well, why go for the lowest order? We suggest getting a guardian seraph instead.

MONDAY, JANUARY 31st, 2022 - Theology on Tap will gather via Zoom at 7:00

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 1st, 2022 - As always, Beaches Prayer Group will gather at 9:30